I have always had a soft spot for southpaws and how they display such pride for their dominant hand. In a world where most people want to fit in, left-handers rebel - they are different, and they are proud. I kinda like that. Perhaps I have always been interested in lefties since we are kindred spirits of sorts. Yes, I am a right-hander who possesses one curious left-handed trait: thanks to my first grade teacher, Cindy Martin, I write like a leftie. I, too, experience the dreaded smear of ink on the paper and I, too, must pause to wash the ink off the side of my hand before I move on to the next line. It's a tedious affair sometimes. August 13 marks Left Handers Day, which is just around the corner. Their slogan, "Celebrate Your Right to be Left Handed" speaks volumes about their agenda, I think. To give you a better idea of what they're all about, here's the chorus for the song "Lefty Lament," written by long-standing Left Handers Club member Ian Radburn: We're the Cack-Handed Kings, we're the LEFTIES
You right-handers just haven't got a clue
'Cos if you'd been through what we've been through
Then maybe you would feel superior too!
As you can imagine, the rest of the song is basically a laundry list of problems left handers face in their everyday lives (clashing with his right-handed wife, for example) and how they just feel different.
After a bit of research, it is glaringly evident that the word "left" is surrounded solely by negative connotations. In Welsh, the word chwith means left, but can also mean strange, awkward, or wrong. In ancient China, the left has been the "bad" side. The adjective "left" means "improper" or "out of accord". In Russian, "to stray left" is a euphemism for being unfaithful to a spouse or partner. The question is: Why, then, do some countries drive on the "bad" side of the road? About a quarter of the world drives on the left side of the road - mostly old British colonies. This transportation quirk may be seen as just another way to isolate the left in a right world, but there is a perfectly good reason for it. Believe it or not, it all comes down to a bit of swordplay.
In the past, almost everybody travelled on the left side of the road since that was the most sensible option for feudal, violent societies. Since most people are right-handed, swordsmen preferred to keep to the left so that their right arm would be closer to their opponent and their scabbard further from him. Moreover, it reduced the chance of the scabbard (worn on the left) hitting other people.
In addition, it is easier for a right-handed person to mount a horse from the animal's left side, and it would be very difficult to do otherwise if wearing a sword (which would be worn on the left). It is safer to mount and dismount towards the side of the road rather than in the middle of traffic, so if one mounts on the left, then the horse should be ridden on the left side of the road. Simple as that.
As it happens, Napoleon, everyone's favorite self-proclaimed Emperor, was a southpaw and is also the man responsible for France's keep-right practice. A popular story from the Napoleonic period states the country's leader changed the rule of the road in all of the countries he conquered from keep-left to keep-right. Thanks to Napoleon's dominant hand, his armies had to march on the right so he could keep his sword arm between him and the advancing enemy. From this time any part of the world that was colonised by the French would travel on the right, while the rest would continue travelling on the left.
Some countries still manage to keep things interesting, though. Montreal's Autoroute 20 is a prime example - between Route 138 and the Turcot Interchange, the carriageways reverse, making it one of the only stretches of roadway in Canada where traffic drives on the left side of the road. O Canada!
The question becomes, when will the lefties of the world colonize their own state, where everyday is Left Handers Day, President Radburn rules, and left-handed coffee mugs, notebooks, and keep-left signs are omnipresent?
